Whoosh a cloud of water splashed us.
The boat was going to fast the rocks looked like chocolate.
The water was so frothy it looked like a bubble bath.
When the ride stoped I coldn't believe my eyes.
My heart was beating so fast I couldn't count the beat
That was amazing.
By Georgia.
7 comments:
You have used interesting words to build up a clear picture in the readers mind of what it would be like to be on the jet boat. Great writing!!!
Mrs Wispinski
You have used interesting words to build up a clear picture in the readers mind of what it would be like to be on the jet boat. Great writing!!!
Mrs Wispinski
Hi Georgia,
*I think you have used interesting adjectives to paint a clear picture in the readers mind.
*I really like how you used a simile, it made it more interesting.
*I think you could improve it by describing what the boat was like.
Maia,
Room 1 :D
to georgia nice work put some storng agecetives next time from sophie
to georgia nice work put some storng agecetives next time from sophie
to georgia nice work put some storng agecetives next time from sophie
to georgia nice work put some storng agecetives next time from sophie
Post a Comment